Game 1 is a MUST WIN for the Celtics

What a wild ride Celtics fandom has been. The patented Green Teamer Optimism that seemed to dominate the narrative for years, last winter turned to despair, as the team disgracefully underachieved. Speculation was rampant the team would need to be broken up, their top guys would be opting out, Smart was a cancer, our pets’ heads are falling off. Then, just as Felger Fervor was reaching a fever pitch….the C’s became the hottest team on the planet. They not only lived up to their potential, they surpassed the expectations of everyone, shut up all the anti-Green Teamers, and made a legit run at a Championship.

Then, refusing to be satisfied, they followed up the run with a couple of moves- acquiring Malcolm Brogdon and Danilo Gallinari- addressing their only serious perceived weaknesses.

If you tuned out in July, you may be showing up to tonight’s season opener expecting this to be Green Teamer Porn. A thrilling kickoff to the ultimate coronation of the new Kings of the East, and maybe the NBA…..

The last 2+ months have been an utter shitshow.

The years’ long obsession with KD peaked this year. Brad was not only another Durant Runner-Up, he also managed to piss off Jaylen Brown (who will need to sign an extension in the near future), while also further empowering Marcus Smart and his massive ego by publicly refusing to include him in a deal- ultimately killing the potential trade.

As if that wasn’t enough, soon after, Gallinari blew out his knee playing some summer ball.

Then last month, came the real stunner. The team’s much-praised coach couldn’t keep his little Ime in his pants, to the point where it necessitated a YEAR LONG SUSPENSION.

People…this is the National Basketball Association. Side chicks are as valued as PER and Win Shares per 48. So for this dude to be suspended for a season, it must’ve been some serious shit. Dude was reportedly fucking everything that moved around the office, from a Latter Day Secretary, to an Owner’s wife, and probably everything in between.

A hard-core Green Teamer, like my Buddy Marty, could probably make an argument this is a positive, because do you really want a guy with bad enough judgement to cheat on Nia Long making decisions for you in crunch time? But I don’t buy it. He brought this team from the brink of failure to within a game of a title…a bionic green teamer with the Body of Scal, the Brain of Drapes, the Hair of Forsberg, the Chair of Perk, and the Charm and Face of Abby Chin, isn’t powerful enough to spin this one…

Which all brings us back to tonight. The Sixers are a punchline come playoff time, but still pose a threat to the C’s in the East. Embiid is a super-duper-star, and there’s enough talent around him to make this team dangerous. If the Celtics want to gloss over any of this bad shit, they NEED to come out tonight and dominate. If they get off to a bad start, shit is going to spiral out of control.

Tonight, game 1 of 82, is a MUST WIN.

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