Irish Team “Kills” Player. Who would Boston teams “kill”?

In an incident so befitting of an amateur Irish Football Club (or the Knicks), Ballybrack FC of the Leinster Senior Legue erroneously reported one of their players, Fernando Nuno La Fuente, dead this week. The claim was that he died in a car crash.

A death notice appeared in the paper. A game was postponed. Guys wore armbands. There was even a league-wide moment of silence to honor the fallen footballer.

All the while, La Fuente was chillin’ with his amigos back home in Spain.

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According to a release by the club, the “grave and unacceptable mistake was completely out of character and was made by a person who has been experiencing severe personal difficulties unbeknownst to any other members of the club”.

The team has since fired the person, but we simply NEED to know more about this.

Someone who is employed by the team did this on purpose? That is just diabolical. It’s a Reverse Carlo. Instead of saying you sent him to Vegas, but really killing him…you actually let him go away, and then tell everyone he’s dead.

 

Carlo

 

I hereby dispatch the HTTA investigative team to dig into this one, but in the meantime, it got me thinking. What if teams could just, simply, disappear people?

 

Who among the Boston teams would be ideal for the REVERSE CARLO?

 


Tuukka Rask

NHL: Boston Bruins at Nashville Predators

The Bruins actually kinda sorta tried this, with the cryptic reports of his “leave of absence”, and they even got guys on the team to play along with the vagueness of it. But, Rask returned after a few days, so obviously they didn’t go far enough.

Bottom line, he’s paid like a stud, and hardly plays like one anymore. Almost as bad as working with Barzini.


Terry Rozier

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Dude was great last year…and was an HTTA favorite. But my man won’t shut his mouth off the court, and won’t stop shooting on the court. He seems only to be motivated by his next contract and moving merch. The only thing saving him from being disappeared is he has some trade value, and doesn’t make a ton of $…but simply put, get “Scary Terry” (gigantic eyeroll) a car to the airport.

 


Dustin Pedroia

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The cautionary tale of a “team friendly” deal turning “unmovable” seemingly overnight. Between this guy’s never being available to play, his acting like a punk selling out his team last year, and his general douchiness and overrated-ness…I’m sure Henry & Co. would love to send ole Dusty Two Sacks out for a car ride with Clemenza.


 

Bill Belichick

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Bill’s usually the one who makes guys disappear. But, over the last year it’s become clear who runs the show down there on the biggest decisions (Jimmy G and Gronk trades, Josh McD returning)-  it’s #12. He’s got Kraft in his pocket, and if Tommy were to say the word, The Hoody would be sleeping with the fishes. I’m mixing my Godfather references. I’ve confused myself with this entire premise….

 

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