The first Golf Major of the year is in the books and while it wasn’t the greatest,most thrilling golf tournament of all-time it wasn’t a cake walk either. Sunday was the funday and the Han Solo of golf, the New American Badass, a possible petty thief with a definite God Complex, 2018 Masters Champion Patrick Reed is your Weekend Winner.
There’s A LOT of stories floating around the interwebs about ol’ Patrick right now. He was booted from a few colleges, maybe sorta stole from his own teammates and also maybe sorta cheats during practice rounds but who cares right? He’s the baby faced assassin who faced down the charging field and said “Not today you bastards. Not today.”
Congratulations Patrick. Go celebrate with your fam…oh he cut off all ties with his family…okay celebrate with your frien…oh he has no friends cuz everyone on the Tour hates his guts…well Patrick enjoy that Scotch & Cigar (this dude just screams Scotch & Cigar) and on the bright side your eventual obituary may not say “fondly remembered by family and friends’ but it will say 2018 Masters Champ.