We’ve Randomly chosen today to highlight 13 things that are bothering us, and we’re handing out 13 Indictments.
Lists like this that make you click “Next” 13 times: Maybe some sites are of less character than us, or really put the money over the enjoyment of the reader. NOT THIS SITE!!! NOT US!!!!
NCAA: As we covered earlier, an Arizona cheerleader was kicked out of a game for saying, GASP, “Not today, Remy”, to an opposing player. The HORROR!!!
Hot Stove Season: Baseball needs excitement, and they drove the most exciting 6 weeks of their game directly into the ground. Nice job, old white guys.
Lavar Ball: Threatening Lonzo will leave the Lakers (in 5 YEARS, BTW) if they don’t sign his two other Balls, who are trash ballers. That’s not fair…they might be great. And there’s no better way to develop your game than the Lithuanian Basketball League.
Hanley Ramirez: He says he wants to play “a 150, or 158 games” at first base?! I admire the…uh…whatever it is that made you say that. But zero chance, bro, for many reasons.
NBC: Bode Miller on prime time television? Complete waste of talent as an athlete, and he’s famous for refusing to not smoke pot. This guy is going to bring some energy to the broadcast? Bode…why don’t you say “Inspirational” a few more times.
Lisa Marie Presley: She’s claiming she’s 16M in debt. Huh? How? Check Priscilla’s freezer, that oughta cover it.
Jon Lester: My man came out as Pro- Mound Visits. This is like being Pro- Puppy Torture
Gronkowski to WWE: This, at least, is the most entertaining contract dispute in NFL history. But c’mon. Only fake ass athletes like Rousey go to the WWE.
This is Us: Who do you think you are? You get to have a character be dead, tease his death for a year, then tell people how it happened, they trash their Crock Pots, and now you’re teasing new story lines for the character who is DEAD? You KILL a character…and that’s it. One ratings stunt per show, please! This Is Us has…..
JUMPED THE SHARK!!!
That Mean Guy on Some Sirius Station who was saying things about Lil’ Dogg’s new fave, Chloe Kim. For shame…dirtbag. We got your back Chloe!
TBS: I get that you might not want to block off 2 hours every single night for Seinfeld re-runs…but to go to ZERO? And some of those times you’re airing Two Broke Girls??!?!?!?! C’MON TBS….I promise if you bring it back, I’ll watch Con Air the next 10 times you air it.
Snow Volleyball: The Austrian Olympic Committee pitched this as an Olympic Sport…this is not a thing. It’s a sport, and you’ve just decided to play it in a much stupider manner. If this happens, I’m petitioning drunken golf, and opposite hand baseball.