We’re old school here at Hi-Top Nation so when it comes to ranking St. Nick’s trusty reindeer we have to keep it to just the OGs. Besides you throw in a ninth and the whole balance of the sleigh goes out of whack.
Presenting the definitive, no debate needed, this is the list, Top 8 Santa’s Reindeer:
8. Prancer – I need power and muscle pulling my sleigh. Can’t have one my leads prancing about.
7. Dancer – Same as above. No fancy footwork wanted just grit and determination. It’s a long night. No time for messing around.
6. Cupid – This is my Glue Guy. Cupid gets the whole team working on the same page, squashes any beefs before they start ruining the locker room. When things get tough Cupid steps in and lightens the mood, pulls everyone together.
5. Donder – It’s not Donner it’s Donder. Learn it. Live it. Donder brings the Thunder.
4. Comet – The name of the game is speed my friends. Comet is pure speed.
3. Dasher – You need to be quick off the line and Dasher has the burst to get off a roof and up in the air.
2. Vixen – The unsung hero of the group. Vixen brings the attitude. Getting around the world in one night takes more than speed. You need that cocky no-BS get in line and follow me Alpha up at the front of the sleigh and Vixen is that Reindeer.
1. Blitzen – Lightning. There’s nothing faster than lighting. Power too. Just the ultimate combination that you need to have at the front of the sleigh pulling extra weight when Prancer and Dancer and the rest of the back line guys starting taking breaks. No plays off when you’re out front with your antlers on the line. Blitzen is the Reindeer you NEED leading the charge. Otherwise those presents never get to all those good little boys and girls. Can’t have that and Blitzen would never let it happen.
That’s it. That’s the list. Facts is Facts.