Shameless 1980’s Nostalgia Tournament – Match-up #5 – My Pet Monster vs Teddy Ruxpin

Welcome back to the Shameless 1980’s Nostalgia Tournament. The premise is simple. We pit two awesome things from the 80’s against each other and our expert panel of Nostalgia Profiteers decide which awesome thing is more awesome.

Tubular!!!!!!

First Round Matchup #5 –

 

My Pet Monster

vs

 

Teddy Ruxpin

This right here is what you call a Battle of the Heavyweights. Two of the icons from the “it’s a doll but it’s not really a doll so it’s okay for boys to want one” category. Now listen, we here at Hi-Topper Nation make no judgements – play with dolls, wear a tutu, be who you’re meant to be – it’s all good here but back in the 1980’s it was a bit of a different story. To sell a doll to a boy there had to be catch – “It’s not a doll, it’s an Army Guy” type of deal.

Of course My Pet Monster was more aggressively targeting the male demo:

But Teddy Ruxpin was right there too:

What it really comes down to in this match-up is the gimmicks. My Pet Monster has handcuffs. Teddy Ruxpin “talks”. So which was cooler in 1986?

Winner – Teddy Ruxpin

Handcuffs are cool and all, they have many uses (wink wink) but facts is facts and My Pet Monster was just weak. It wasn’t particularly scary, even a 7 year old knew carrying one around was not really an option when a game of Red Rover could break out at any moment.

Teddy on the other hand, as any halfway mischievous 80’s child quickly found out, could “talk” using ANY CASSETTE TAPE YOU WANTED!!!!

If you don’t think Teddy Ruxpin rapping songs off License to Ill in 1986 was the absolute height of hilarity well then you must not have been in Third Grade in 1986.

You want Metal Teddy? Boom:

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