The One Thing the City of Champions Lacks…

With the Houston Astros on the verge of securing their first ever World Series Championship Trophy, it has this Boston #regularguy reminiscing about the long ago days of February 2017. The last time Boston won a Championship was 267 days ago. 

That’s a long time guys. 

For the City of Champions, that is. 

Listen Hi-Topper Nation, everyone knows why Boston is the City of Champions. We’re winners, plain and simple. We stack Trophies like other cities stack parking tickets. (We do that too of course, shoutout to the nice people of the Somerville Parking Patrol, ya sumbitches)

So, you’re probably asking yourself, how could the City of Champions be lacking anything? Well take a look at this:

That is what passes for this great city’s flag. 

Who cares, right? Well, this pup does and so should you. 

Flags fall into two distinct categories: Cool and Not Cool. 

Chicago has a Cool Flag:

South Carolina also Cool:

Here’s some Not Cool flags:

Notice anything?

Again, Cool:

Not Cool:

Yes that’s Massachusetts. In addition to having a Not Cool Boston flag we also have a Not Cool state flag. 

Not Cool flags usually are lame, uninspired and lazy because of one thing – some piss poor designer just put the state seal on the flag and said “Job Done”. That’s precisely what happened with Boston and Massachusetts. 

Cool Flags can be flown outside your home, waved in parking lots at tailgates (have you ever seen a Boston City Flag in Gilette’s parking lot before a Pats game – I didn’t think so) or tattooed on your body if your into that sort of thing. 

Boston doesn’t just need a Cool Flag, it deserves one. How could the City of Champions have anything less. Is Chicago better than Boston cuz their hipsters have a flag tattoo next to their Cubbie tattoo? They certainly think so. 

So come on Boston. You’re the City of Champions, act like it one time and get me a Cool Flag I can consider getting tattooed on my arm then decide nah that looks like it hurts. 

– Lil’ Dogg

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