Brady never stops…selling

Aston Martin has begun selling the Tom Brady Signature Edition car. Warning…this is not for #regularguys. Not even your run-of-the-mill magnate can touch this- coming in at a cool 360K. It sounds like our local QB had some input on some design elements, and his signature appears on the vehicle, as well as his TB12 logo.

astin martin

Then there is this utterly mystifying quote from Aston Martin chief creative office- whatever the hell that title is:

“This car touches people through a voice in Tom that they understand,” Reichman said. “He speaks English in an American’s English and he’s telling the world why he loves our product. It’s as simple as that.”

Now, I don’t know if he’s just crazy, pompous, or if he’s outright taking a shot at Brady, or all Americans. But one thing I do know for sure is, he wants to either bang Brady, or the car…or both.

Now, I’m not going to pony up the 360K for the car- after all, we may be looking at upgrading our beach house…from a one week rental to a two week ( I told you, Le Cap is doing alright)- but if I did buy the Tom Brady car, he’s what I’d expect to see:

  • A ice cold water dispenser that bottom fills a stainless steel mug residing in the cup-holder from a 5 gallon reserve tank in the trunk. That way you can stay hydrated and ride with top down…no sunburns.
  • TB12 Edition Satellite radio– Regular satellite radio, but with an added station that plays nothing but Brazilian techno music
  • Internal navigation system with the voice of Alex Guerrero. He directs you where to go, not just on your trip, but gives you life direction at the same time. The system keeps you in the present, and focused. And, though it does not claim that his voice alone will cure cancer, it doesn’t not claim it.
  • Special mind and reflex games are present throughout the vehicle for the driver and all passengers, so that even if you can’t prevent an accident, you will be equipped to withstand concussions that would effect others.

In addition, you get another car with it that looks very similar. A “backup car”, so to speak. It performs pretty well, for short trips. However, even a fender bender will put the car out of commission for quite a while. Don’t let the fact that you could drive other cars after similar accidents fool you. This car needs to be put in the shop for a few weeks, no matter how badly you need it. You should trade it quickly, for whatever someone will give you.

Le Capitaine

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